Ms Perfectionist, here's the door

In wanting to excel at everything I do, I periodically come face to face with my Ms. Perfectionist in the mirror. 

She's been my friend for years, my confidante, my cheerleader. 

But here's the thing. 

Ms. Busy Busy Busy also keeps me from doing some things that matter, like having a slow morning, watching cartoons, and enjoying a conversation about nothing. These are important, too.

In my (ahem) almost-thirties, I am so at peace with who I am and what I bring to the table.

I came across some good reminders about nipping those perfectionist thoughts in the bud. It's all about excellence, rather than perfection.

I found this on my travels in the interweb:

"We all want to stay true to ourselves. Of course we do. But it's okay if the "yourself" you're staying true to has changed. When you were 20, you thought you'd take a bucket-list trip every year and have enlightening conversations about the meaning of life at every dinner (each one of which would be life-changing-ly delicious and exotic). If the 40-year-old you is happy, then don't let 20-year-old hold you hostage. No offense, but 20-year-old you was so...20 years ago.

We know, we know, you're almost perfect. You can imagine the perfect you. She's a lot like real you, except just a touch perfecter. She effortlessly balances her stellar career and social life, puts her partner and family first and every night finds time to make an interesting and healthful dinner, spotlessly clean her home, talk to her mother, knit a baby hat for a friend, run three miles, read a novel and, of course, get enough sleep so that she can be that same stellar self in the morning. She would be the perfect partner. And so many of us fall into her wily trap, trying to become her and in the process driving ourselves—and everyone else—crazy. Here's the thing about Perfect Woman: She's boring. She makes everyone feel bad for not being as perfect as she is. And besides, too much self-sacrifice doesn't actually make a woman perfect; in practice, it makes her frantic. Does your partner want to spend eternity with a frantic woman? More importantly, do you? Didn't think so."

I've got a great career in my future, a loving husband and son, and things are looking up.

Be well!

Today my life changed

Today my life changed.

It wasn't a big bang.

It wasn't roses.

It wasn't an epiphany.

It was returning home to what is in my heart of hearts. ee cummings said something like "the truth of the truth and the bud of the bud."

I started my dream job today. I'm a research associate for a study of depression in neurological conditions. My dream is to ensure appropriate and better health services access to under served populations.

What is your dream? Remember? Take the first step and email that contact person whose name you keep coming across. Make use of the people in your network who are where you want to be.

You can do it.

I believe in you.

I am thankful for:

I am thankful for the freedoms I have.

I was reminded of this while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies, and hearing some of the illnesses, and lack of freedoms, that some of the athletes have overcome.

Girls and Guys: Love yourself

I went shopping for a couple of tops today. My new research job starts on Monday and I want to feel ready.

As I was staring in the mirror, wondering which shirt made me look less chubby, I overheard a young girl (14 or 15) outside my change room: "Ugh! I am so chubby! If anyone sees me in this, they'll just - aw man. I look so bad!"

Wake up call. Why do we listen to those negative self scripts and indulge them? What difference does it make if we need to lose the last ten pounds? I've had 'the last 25' on the brain since having my son. We're probably drop dead gorgeous anyway, but there those voices are, just the same.

I told her she looked beautiful, and had the tiniest waist.

Here's my call out to you, cyber people: For the next week, every time you berate yourself ("I am SO clumsy!"), follow it up with something loving ("I am SO awesome!".) Keep up a 1:1 ratio this week. I dare you. Let me know how it goes, blog buddies! I'll check back, too!

I am thankful for:

I am thankful for my son's health. I am thankful that we live in a country and province with health care that covers life-saving operations.

Driving back home, my heart feels light.

What are you thankful for today?